Finding true love on Tinder in Korea
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In Korea, casual dating is a relatively modern development. Previously, love and marriage in Korea followed the Confucian paradigm of "dating," in which marriage is typically the outcome of a familial agreement and aims to provide social and economic stability. As a result, being on Tinder and actively seeking a relationship might come across as "trying too hard" or "desperate."
However, when I asked a friend about the prevalence of blind dates, or sogaeting, in Korean culture, she said, "Well, literally, sogeting means introduction, not a blind date. While many individuals come in looking for a date, it is not as obvious as being on a dating app."
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A video caught my attention when I was scrolling through TikTok as usual one day.
A Russian girl showcased profiles of Korean men she came across on Tinder, describing them as the "Korean Dream." However, the comments section's reaction was unexpectedly negative. Comments such as "Run," "another Hongdae boy," "don't trust them" and "he's probably not serious" made me question the underlying reasons for these unfavorable perceptions of Tinder and dating apps in general in Korea.
According to my Korean friend, dating apps in Korea exist in "a distinct realm." Tinder in Korea, in particular, is not widely regarded as a reliable platform for seeking genuine love. While a few verified profiles may appear legitimate, the vast majority are anonymous.
Often, individuals only provide an initial or a nickname as their profile name, and their pictures tend to obscure their faces. This lack of transparency creates uncertainty and hesitation among users, making them reluctant to meet people from dating apps, let alone consider pursuing a serious relationship.
"You never know who's on the other side of the screen," my friend said.
Elvi Eliina Sillanpaeae, a 20-year-old Finnish student, said she had similar experiences with Tinder in Korea. While she acknowledged that there were individuals seeking sexual encounters on the app in Finland, she found this phenomenon to be more prevalent in Korea.
Sillanpaeae said that Tinder profiles in Korea often lack details such as faces, hobbies, and names. Meanwhile, explicit information about sexual preferences, outcomes of online kink tests, individuals' heights, shoulder length or even the size of their private parts was frequently included in Korean Tinder profiles. Furthermore, some users openly express their desire to find "friends with benefits" or use euphemistic phrases like "looking for an open-minded person."
"They are definitely more straightforward about their intentions," Sillanpaeae said.
When I started investigating the causes of this phenomenon, several of my Korean friends mentioned numerous cultural factors as the primary reason Tinder is an unpopular avenue for finding a relationship.
One explanation for this is the widespread stigma surrounding the act of finding a date.
In Korea, casual dating is a relatively modern development. Previously, love and marriage in Korea followed the Confucian paradigm of "dating," in which marriage is typically the outcome of a familial agreement and aims to provide social and economic stability. As a result, being on Tinder and actively seeking a relationship might come across as "trying too hard" or "desperate."
However, when I asked a friend about the prevalence of blind dates, or sogaeting, in Korean culture, she said, "Well, literally, sogeting means introduction, not a blind date. While many individuals come in looking for a date, it is not as obvious as being on a dating app."
It was also found that some prefer sogaeting over dating apps for security concerns.
On Tinder, you'll encounter a variety of people, some of whom cover their faces and names. In comparison, when you go on a blind date, you at least have a good notion of who they are and their demographic.
Additionally, sogaeting frequently occurs in groups, which provides you with a sense of protection.
BY STUDENT REPORTER VU DUC TOAN [kjd.kcampus@joongang.co.kr]
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